Right here.
I speak my mind freely, this is me one hundred percent honest because I honestly don't care who reads this. [to a certain extent] FBI suck it. Whatever. I say what's on my mind here.
I say what I'm feeling in the moment even if it's just for the moment. And I will not and have not ever apologized for anything that's I've posted regarding my own feelings. I don't think that anyone should have regrets. because at one point in time it was exactly what you wanted. And although that moment may have passed there's no need to justify it to the present. It's there. And there's no going back from that, only forward.
What's going on in my mind one may ask:
honestly a bunch of shit.
Random shit.
Things that have been going through my mind for months now.

- Why the fuck do you even pretend like you care about half the shit I say?
- What's the point of pretending to be civil when we're both ready to fight?
- Why the fuck are you still with them, they treat you like shit kid.
- Someone is reading this, and I have no idea if they even know how to spell my name.
- You have no idea how hard it is to let you go. No matter how much bullshit you pull.
- I will always love you. But define love now....
- I haven't been reminded of you constantly in months now, and I feel better than I have in while.
-  I know what love is, and I know most people aren't ready for it.
- I have no idea how I'm going to pay for this shit,
- Sometimes I honestly want to go up to you and say "who the fuck.... do you think you are".
- I wonder if Robert is okay...- I wonder how you are everyday and how I wish I called you more often while you were still here.
- Fuck it, I wish I could spend more time with you while you're still here, yet I keep making dumb decisions that I know I'm going to pay for in the near future.
- I love you, and that will never change, because you were there for me since day one and you'll be there for me until your last day.
- I'll love you until my last day.