“What happens when you add distance to the equation?”
I've been thinking a lot about distances and the time we spend traveling. Ten minutes to the store here, an hour to another state there, it all adds up. The next thing you know you’ve spent nearly ten hours just getting from A to B.
These fairytale love stories that everyone perpetually projects onto themselves (myself included) just kills the vibe sometimes....I fell victim to creating a relationship roadmap once, and more often than not it only set us up for failure. In order to know where you’re going you have to know where you’ve been. You also need to know where the fuck it is you even want to go in the first place.
Especially if you’re traveling with others.
I always knew that my friends were destined to do great things, and I knew that some of those things would unfortunately force some of my friends to move away. But it’s the nights alone, the lunch breaks where you feel most overwhelmed, the walks back to your apartment that make you want to reach out to someone. Whether that person is living with you, down the street, or across the country. No matter the distance, you reach out.
Proximity breeds, for lack of a better word, laziness. You think to yourself, they live about a half an hour away, I can visit them anytime. Or, it's not like they live in another country or something. The closer you are to someone distance-wise, the more you take their actual presence for granted it's true, believe me.
The good thing about being further apart from someone, is your relationship is tested. Either you both start to make the effort.time.commitment towards making up for the lack of miles between you, or the relationship starts to fade into a distant memory. Is it really worth, setting time aside to call, knowing that every time you do they won't pick up? Or is knowing that they'll return a hand-written letter enough to keep you writing about the days you spend apart.
In some cases, when you add distance to the mix, it allows you to see things for what they really are. Who puts in the time and effort to catch-up, if they're willing to go the distance and send surprises, because they can't do so in person. When's the last time you sent someone you hardly see a care-package, or even a letter? Or are you holding out because you're waiting for them to make the effort "first". If that's your mentality, you'll be waiting forever. Sometimes everyone needs a little nudge.
Some of us are lucky enough to have found a person you can call on, anytime, night or day, day or night. And for those of you who may have once had someone; a friend, a cousin, a father, don’t hesitate to go the distance to find them again (if you can) or reach out to someone who may be far away. Your efforts won't go unnoticed if the foundation is strong, I promise.